How to Be a Footballer

Written by:
Peter Crouch
Narrated by:
Peter Crouch

Unabridged Audiobook

Ratings
Book
44
Narrator
11
Release Date
November 2018
Duration
7 hours 36 minutes
Summary
'Very funny on almost every page, wonderfully self-deprecating and very sharp on the ludicrous behaviour of the modern player' - Sunday Times

'The funniest man in British sport' - Metro

**A Sunday Times Sports Book of the Year**
**Shortlisted for the National Book Awards**
**Longlisted for the Telegraph Sports Book Awards Autobiography of the Year**

You become a footballer because you love football. And then you are a footballer, and you're suddenly in the strangest, most baffling world of all. A world where one team-mate comes to training in a bright red suit with matching top-hat, cane and glasses, without any actual glass in them, and another has so many sports cars they forget they have left a Porsche at the train station. Even when their surname is incorporated in the registration plate.

So walk with me into the dressing-room, to find out which players refuse to touch a football before a game, to discover why a load of millionaires never have any shower-gel, and to hear what Cristiano Ronaldo says when he looks at himself in the mirror.

We will go into post-match interviews, make fools of ourselves on social media and try to ensure that we never again pay £250 for a haircut that should have cost a tenner. We'll be coached and cajoled by Harry Redknapp, upset Rafa Benitez and be soothed by the sound of an accordion played by Sven-Goran Eriksson's assistant Tord Grip. There will be some very bad music and some very bad decisions.

I am Peter Crouch. This is How To Be A Footballer. Shall we?
Reviews
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James B.

Funny and insightful a perfect mix.

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Anonymous

Great insight into his career. Honest, funny and made better by the fact he narrates it himself.

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PAUL K.

Very entertaining, very well read and full marks for content - especially for a footy autobiography.

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Kevin L.

Crouchy reading this absolutely makes it! His personality really shines through! Brilliant insight and pretty funny too! Really enjoyed it!

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Steve R.

Cracking listen who knew Crouchy was so funny - made even better its read by Peter himself, thanks for the memories Big Man (with a lovely touch haha). Look forward to the continued podcasts etc

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